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User blog:Corporal Genesis DXTR/ERBODXTR: Jesus Christ vs Eminem
Hail Mary! No, wait, that's Tupac. Different rapper. In this edition of Epic Rap Battles of DXTR, the son of God, the saviour, and the central figure of Christianity, Jesus H. Christ, battles off against famous white Detroit-based rapper Marshall Mathers/Slim Shady/Eminem. It's gonna be fucking brilliant. Hopefully. Click on the thumbnails to view the self-made shitty titlecards. Cast Nice Peter as Eminem EpicLLOYD as Jesus Christ DeStorm Power as Proof, Kon Artis and Bugz Iman Crosson as Bizarre, Swifty McVay and Fuzz Scoota Alex Farnham as Saint Peter Battle EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! MARSHALL MATHERS! VS! JESUS CHRIST! BEGIN! Eminem- The name's Marshall Mathers, I'm a caring father, you're a jerk You try to piss me off? That's a bad idea, I'll go plain mad, Berzerk Jesus H. Christ! You're so terrible, I can't even believe you call it rap I shouldn't call it that, I'll call it holy shit, because it's all Lil Wayne crap. Don't cross my path, I'll kill you, you can kiss my ass, call me Judas I'd rather be Buddha than Jewish, you're useless, I make good music My homies will murder you all over again, cruciFYI, I spit sick raps Give you some of your blood, intoxicated, you'll suffer a Relapse Jesus- Who is this ignoramus, stop Cleanin' your Closet, and come out. This heavenly saviour, the messiah, will kick you back down the 8 Mile route I know you and Elton John performed more than just a song, stop with the lies and shit I've got honest Proof that you're a shitty rapper, Chris Brown has had a better hit You're good at making music? Ah, Ken, I really love the way you lie. Your Legacy is over, here's tip Marshall, FACK off, you're a Bad Guy. You're a useless shitty cracker, making sweet music with Dr. Dre Say goodbye to Hollywood, motherfucker, because you've met your day. The rest of D12, alive or dead, come in to aid Marshall. Eminem- Your attempts to beat me are hella tight, JC, but they're nothing. Proof- D12's in the house, motherfuckers. Messiah my ass, you're disgusting. Bizarre- We'll rape your wife and murder your disciples, bitch, you'll get nailed. Kon Artis- We'll beat you up harder, faster, stronger than when 2 Chainz got jailed Kuniva- Oh my God, stop being a little shit, don't be a retard, show class Swifty McVay- You can take your loaves and fish and shove them up your ass. Bugz- You'll get clubbed and shot, like Proof rolled into one, with added me. Fuzz Scoota- When you mess with The Dirty Dozen, you'll get fucked, don't you see? Saint Peter arrives from heaven to aid Christ. Christ- You've realy fucked it up now, haven't you bitches? Peter- Bugz and Proof shouldn't even be here? Did they get new stitches? Christ- I am the leader of the Christians, spreader of the good word, the holy land Peter- After we're done with you, you'll be so afraid, unable to even take a stand Christ- We'll give you a thorn crown to cry about, drive you mad, call me Stan Peter- Grow up bitches, stop being Peter Pan, you've gone down the can, Do the after-Math, you shits, get thy Jergens, for another serious ass-fuc''king'' Jesus- Stop being retards, this is the holy bible, not the studio. You may be rap god. But I'm the king. WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EPIC *angelic choir* RAP *chika-chika* BATTLES OF HISTORY! After-Notes Well...That was eventful. If you have any, absolutely ''any ''questions about the references in this battle, don't be afraid to ask. Please do, I want everyone to be clear. :) Poll Who do you think won? Eminem & D12 Jesus Christ & Saint Peter Category:Blog posts